Walk with me; see the green grass, the trees in the breeze.  The ruffle of a feather, the old man on his knees.  Stand, hold my hand, and watch as the sun sets on a time full of high seas and low tides.  Run; run, as we dance to the shimmer of the water.  Hold tight, come close, and sit beside me as we entangle our souls.  Souls bound by endless greed, the need, it started with one seed, bound by time, not ready to be freed.  Lie down, hold tight, sleep, hold tight.  Dream, hold tight.  Watch, wait, stand, walk, run, keep up, hold on, and dance to the strings that play in my heart.  Laugh till we cry, love forever more; live, until we die.

I have loved the first paragraph of this since I wrote it New Year’s Eve three years ago.  The title is “The Lucky Ones.”  I have always felt that it encompasses so well how we have lived our lives together.  From the first day I touched her hand I knew I would never let it go, and if I had to guess, out of twenty-two years together we have been apart less than a hundred days.  When I read that paragraph I read it with a pretty fast cadence.  To me it is the urgency of my love and passion coming out, but also it was the speed that Tammy lived life.  Tammy lived life like the grand finale’ on the Fourth of July.  Fireworks going off everywhere.  She had a fire in her that I sometimes had a hard time keeping up with.  If you need proof you need not look any further than our two oldest kids who happen to be the same age for a month and a half every year.  Yes, we had two one year old’s.  Then a two and a one year old, and then a three, two, and one year old.  I was pretty sure we were going to give Lanelle, our Parents as Teachers person, a heart attack.  Every time she was scheduled I was afraid she was going to cancel because she was afraid Tammy was going to tell her she was pregnant again.  Tammy didn’t miss a beat though.  She loved them all so much that she wanted another one six years later.

If I had to pin one word on Tammy it would be passionate.  She did everything with passion.  There was never much of a middle ground with her.  If it was sports, she practiced hard and played harder.  As a teacher, she was going to give you everything you needed to be successful.  Then she was going to love and care enough about you, to make you believe in yourself.  She always loved the underdog because she took the time to see the potential that they had.  She taught them to never give up on themselves, because no matter what, they knew that Tammy would never give up on them.  Some of you listening right now are one of those people, and I assure you, Momma Bear is still watching over you, and when times get tough that voice in your head will say, never give up, never give up.

Tammy took on cancer just like she took on everything else.  She took each step and attacked it with passion.   As I would look down the road she would stay laser focused on whatever was right in front of her.  Tammy was never known for her defense on the basketball court.  She was known for her offense, and so she went on the offensive and attacked it.  She fought it with every ounce of strength that she had.  I will never tell you that Tammy lost her battle with cancer.  She beat it every step of the way.  She beat it with her attitude.  She beat it with her heart, her courage, and most of all she beat it with her smile.  She smiled every day including the last day.

How do you sum up someone’s life in a few short words?  I feel I have lost my eloquence.  I miss her dearly already.  The only thing I can think to do is leave you with a final story.  The kids and I were lucky that we were able to spend a good amount of time with Tammy. Can you picture the five of us all sitting around Tammy’s bed, each of us touching her somewhere? We had been there for a while and I thought we needed a little break so I asked each of them to tell a corny joke and we would pick a winner.  The winner was Kylee with, “What do Romans use to cut their Pizza?”  Answer:  “Little Caesars.”  We all had a good chuckle.  Throughout our conversations I have been telling them that it is ok to be sad, it is ok to be mad, but it is also ok to be happy.  After a while I asked each of them to tell me their favorite thing about Mom.  Tanner said that she never gives up on anyone.  Kylee said she loves her strength. Morgan said her good attitude.  Tucker said just being her.  Mine was her big heart, she always had room for everyone.  My response to them was then go be that.  If mom never gives up on anyone then believe in everyone.  If you love how strong mom was, then go be strong.  If you loved her attitude then always have a good attitude.  If her heart was big enough for everyone then open yours.  Tucker’s was a summation of all of them.  If you loved who your mom was, then go be like her.

My message to all of you is the same.  On this very tough day, it is ok to cry.  It is ok to be mad, but also it is ok to be happy and celebrate Tammy’s life.  I will also ask you the same question.  What did you love about Tammy?  Then I will tell you that the way to keep Tammy alive in all of us, the way to keep her in our heart, is to take everything that we love about her and give it to someone else in our lives.  Give her to the world and let her live though eternity.